Ask Mom & Spawn!

Ask Mom & Spawn: Mr. Nice Guy or TOTAL Nightmare?

Mr. Nice Guy

“I’ve been with this guy for a few months and he is soooo not a beautiful sperminator. But I fell for his beautiful heart. Lately, he’s been getting meaner and putting our relationship off like it means nothing and making me feel like crap when I try to say something. I feel like this is just a phase but I honestly don’t know. Maybe it’s time for me to end it and check out some real sperminators.” -Meg

@CrazyJewishMom: Send his ugly ass out the door. Anyone who makes you feel bad should be castrated. Buy some pink, self defense, pepper spray and a pink comb that turns into a knife.

@KateFriedmanSiegel: Okay, so definitely don’t do any of that. That said, this relationship doesn’t sound ideal.

@CrazyJewishMom: Ideal? Meg, SNAP OUT OF IT! You’ve been dating the guy for a few months, not a few years, and he’s treating you like a pile of human garbage. What’s the hold up? Cut your losses (along with his balls) and get the hell out of there while your ovaries still work! Case closed.

@KateFriedmanSiegel: Again, I strongly recommend AGAINST assault. But Meg, come on. It doesn’t really sound like his heart is all that “beautiful,” if he’s belittling you and making you feel bad for asking him to make you a priority. A relationship should be a happy, safe space, not a tornado of criticism that makes you feel worse about yourself than you already do. That’s what our mothers are for.

@CrazyJewishMom: HEY!

@KateFriedmanSiegel: Kidding! One more little thing, I really wouldn’t expect him to change – chalking this kind of bad behavior up to being ‘a phase’ is dangerous territory.

@CrazyJewishMom: Yeah. Men don’t change. You can’t fix him, and at the end of the day, people do what they want. And what’s this guy doing? Acting like an insecure, immature, dickless wonder. You sound smart and secure, and that’s probably why he can’t handle being with you. Don’t waste another minute with this loser. Time is the enemy….go find another Sperminator that appreciates you. Do not let his insecurity rub off onto you.

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