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#WhatTheHellHappened: To the Woman Who Wanted to Background Check the Guy She Was Dating

For this week’s #WhatTheHellHappened, we’ve decided to share something a bit different. Anonymous wrote in requesting an anonymous background check for a guy she was seeing as part of our partnership with BeenVerified — which is an amazing background check company that everyone should sign up for immediately and then go background check every single person in their personal lives (AND get 15% off while you’re at it). End plug. Unfortunately, “Anonymous” didn’t have enough information for us to be able to conduct the background check, and we thought that would be that. NOPE. She provided us with an update recently, and we just had to share this story! The reason she originally wanted us to background check him was because the guy she was talking to refused to have her over to his place, wouldn’t stay the night, and was overall acting weird. She was also somewhat interested in a new man, and wanted to know if this first guy was even worth the effort or if her suspicions were right.  

Here’s Anonymous’ dilemma:

I’ve been talking to a guy on and off for a few months and we’ve fooled around a few times as well. He’s told me and showed me that he cares about me and loves talking to me. But he’s never had me over to his place, which I think is weird. He says he just prefers coming over to my place. I’ve told him that I’d be open to having him spend the night but he never does. Can y’all check him out and see if there’s anything I should be worried about? Like a live in girlfriend or wife? Cause I can’t think of any reason besides those because he has a good job and has not made it a secret that he makes enough money not to live with his parents and has his own apartment.

At the same time, there is another guy I’ve been talking to who I click with, but he’s a doctor in his first year residency and says he doesn’t have time to be more than friends, even after we hooked up. But we do text everyday, and I might more inclined to explore things with him than this guy I want you to do a background check. What do you think?” -Anonymous

Luckily, the first guy ended up coming clean…and let us say it’s pretty crazy and messed up.

So #WhatTheHellHappened?

“So I actually have an update for y’all. I went to visit my parents out of state and during that time I did try and find out the guy’s last name so you could run a background check. He refused to tell me. Then a few days ago before I came back home, I told him I’d like to send him something to look forward to make his first day back at work a little better. He never replied back. Yesterday he texted me and said he had something serious to tell me. He then tells me that he knows how much I value honesty and doesn’t think we should continue to be involved if I’m not okay with what he wanted to tell me. Then he tells me he’s not single, that’s he’s married. He’s been with her for 6 +  years. But wants me to be his mistress because he loves talking to me and how adventurous I am in the bedroom since at most he and his wife only have sex every two months and before me there was only masturbation and porn. I doubt that last part.

I told him I’m not okay with cheating since I respect any vow and I hope he’s going to be just as honest with his wife as he was with me about his extramarital affairs if he actually loves her and wants their marriage to last. Also, I decided to be just friends with the doctor because this will hopefully be my last semester of school and I’ll need all hands on deck. Love/Sex life will be on the back burner.” – Anonymous

@KateFriedmanSiegel: Holy cheating bastard cannoli! That is completely nuts. I’m so glad you figured all this out and really respect what you said to him when he asked you to be his side piece (what a sociopath!). Also, if you ever do find out his last name, you’re more than within your rights to tell his wife what a jackass he is too.

@CrazyJewishMom: Glad you dodged the fuckboy bullet. And hell yeah, get your education. EDUCATION/ CAREER FIRST, PENIS SECOND.

hires-book-coverRead Kate’s Book!

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