For this week’s #WhatTheHellHappened, we caught up with Valarie, who was feeling very lost while pursuing her degree in NYC. She was losing weight, her hair was falling out, and she felt extremely anxious…before school even started. She wanted to know if she should stay or move to Chicago, where her boyfriend lived. My mom stuck firmly with her “Education First, Penis Second” mantra, saying she “needs to have some phone sex, plan a few trips to Chicago, and then focus on the opportunity she has in front of her.” I didn’t necessarily agree, sharing that “I think it’s completely valid to decide that another situation might make you happier and to then pursue that, but I don’t think you’ve given this path a fair shot.” At the end of the day, we just wanted Valarie to make the best decision for herself.
So, #WhatTheHellHappened? Here’s a refresher on Valarie’s original story, and an update from her below!
“Hello! So, currently very lost. Just graduated from university and only got into one masters program which is in New York City… although an amazing place to be, it wasn’t where I wanted to be and isn’t where my boyfriend is either. I’m pretty unhappy here after two months, I’m losing weight, very anxious and stressed, and starting to lose my hair and school hasn’t even started yet. I had been under the impression I HAD to do this masters program and felt I had my back against the wall, so I HAD to move here even though I’m not completely sure I even want to do this program — it’s just my parents think I should. Now, I’m starting to realize I don’t HAVE to do anything. I could get a job in Chicago, where I wanted to be, where my friends and boyfriend are, and where I think I’d be happy… is it too quick to get up and leave? Is it bad if part of this move is just to be in proximity to my boyfriend if that’s what would make me happy? Is it dumb to turn down a great opportunity others may very much want, but I’m unsure of, just to spend a year or two working and figuring it out?” – Valarie aka “Very lost 22 year old”
So, #WhatTheHellHappened to her?
“Hello! Yes! I actually got into a program I LOVE in Chicago, moved, and been having the best year of my life. I’ve made so many friends, reconnected with old, and been loving my program, new job and internship. It got to the point in NY that my hair was falling out over anxiety and the overall atmosphere there. I realized, my mental health is better than any education (which I’m getting the same here), and I’m in the very lucky situation to be able to get education whenever, but no matter what situation, mental health needs to be looked after! Stepping off that plane into Chicago I literally felt weight lift off me! Been a wild year, but still wouldn’t change it for a thing! Thank you!”
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